The Getting of Wisdom – the painful wayPosted: April 3, 2011
Long time no blog!
I have a lot of material for a lot of blog entries but I’ll begin by telling the story of how I can to be here, ankle splints on both ankles, crutches leaning against the desk and two ankles deciding whether they need to be dosed with painkillers anytime soon.
It was an ordinary day at school last Friday until on my way to playground duty I fell down three steps and found myself in a lots of pain. Somehow I managed to hobble through the prep playground and then to the school office. Both ankles were hurting but the left one was very bad. The beautiful office staff ran around getting me set up in sick bay with a pillow and ice while I waited for dh the come and get me. Later that evening after an x-ray and ultrasound they concluded that the left ankle was badly sprained. I was issued with painkillers and crutches and sent home. That’s when the real trouble began.
I found that I couldn’t put enough weight on the right foot – even with crutches – to get my left ankle in plaster and the rest of me up the stairs. I tried the “backwards on the backside” method but that didn’t work. In fact I actually slid down a few more steps in the throes of trying that maneuver and the boys heard me utter some words I have told them never to say. I ended up slowly and painfully climbing the stairs on my knees. At the top I was stuck on our verandah. I couldn’t flex my feet enough to stand and dh couldn’t get me up. The pain was so bad that I was seeing stars so I had a drink and a rest, then hauled myself onto a stool and then finally into the house. I took myself to bed for a very uncomfortable night trying to get comfortable despite the plaster. I was up early the next morning because of the pain and once I had painfully got myself from the bedroom to the lounge my left ankle was screaming and my right ankle has swollen right up. I persisted for a few hours but eventually realised that this simply wouldn’t work. I rang my wonderful GP who said she was ordering an ambulance and contacting the hospital so I could go back. It was considered far too dangerous for dh to attempt getting me down the stairs again.
This is the part in which we staged an emergency services floor show for the street and my humiliation continued. 2 Ambos arrived and asked me how much I weighed. With that information they decided that they would not be able to get me out and that they would have to call ANOTHER ambulance that had a marvelous device called a “stair chair”. Well, Eric thought it was marvellous – I was just scared! It took an hour for the second ambulance to come so the first team of Ambos and I watched Video Hits (as you do). Then, for the amusement of the neighbours I was toted down the stairs on the famous “stair chair”. I’ll have to google the thing to see what it looks like because I didn’t actually see it.
Then I had 6 nights in hospital where it was eventually determined that the ankle we thought was uninjured but sore was actually sprained and that the one we thought was sprained was actually fractured. I graduated from plaster and elastic bandage to splints on each ankle and from forearm walking frame to crutches. When I was able to do the hospital practice steps four times (to allow for the 12 steps at home) I was allowed to go home.
So now I’m at home, migrating from bed to desk to recliner and working out how to live life on crutches. I’m getting used to planning everything in great detail before I move anywhere and best of all, I have HEAPS of knitting time.